I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
To everyone in the Christmas Tree industry
You all do a great job! Stand up and take a bough!
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
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