No intentional frowning is allowed here.
Where do point guards take their dates to party after the game?
To a basket ball.
What do you call a fish whith a car? A carfish!
What do you do if a running back swallows the football?
You have to get him to cough it up!
I went deep sea diving and a mollusk wanted to give me a hug!
Damn cuddlefish.
My wife drove our German car off the pier into the sea. The next day I went diving to look for it.
I got the Benz.
hat do you call it when a runner from Moscow starts a race at Red Square that ends in Finland?
Russian to the Finnish.
Why should you you stand on the service line? So that you can order ice cream.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
I wish they’d change the scoring system, but tennis is set in its ways and doesn’t see the point.
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
I tried to start a soccer club so I put up some posters on a local bulletin board.
Just to get the ball rolling.
What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
What do you call a winged insect that hits home runs?
A fly swatter.
Why should you not play volleyball in court? Because you could get arrested.
What sport does the Koolaid man play?
Baseball. He's a pitcher.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
Pack your trunks – we’re having a pool party!
This pool is impressive. Or should I say swim-pressive?
How is it that elephants are always ready for a swim?
They never forget their trunks!
Which baseball player makes the best pancakes?
The batter.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
What did the bowling pins do?
They went on strike.
What should you wear when you play against the National Volleyball Team? Football helmets.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
How did the octopuses win the football match?
Ten tackles
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
The injured player wanted to congratulate the winner, but he couldn’t walkover to the other side of the court.
The toilets at an AMF are known as the boweling alleys.
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
Volleyball is air affair. This would be a good motto for your team.
What did the swimming pool say to the skimmer?
Leaf me alone!
Why should you swim in an ool instead of a pool?
Because there’s no “p” in it!
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.
I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.
What country do marathoners retire to?
Iran.
If you want a loyal marriage, get hitched to a basketball player. He will never pass you, rather he will keep you all to himself.
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
I'm currently dating a famous soccer player. He's so loving and caring towards me.
He's a keeper.
Beauty is only pig skin deep
If you do bowling and for some reason you can’t hear a pin drop, something could be wrong with your bowling.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Which Nordique great has recurring ligament problems? Peter Spaz-knee!
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