Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
The crowd had filled up the venue and everyone was waiting for the bowling alley to open. Finally, they got the ball rolling.
My wife drove our German car off the pier into the sea. The next day I went diving to look for it.
I got the Benz.
How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?
FORE!
What are a golfer’s favorite flowers?
Fore-get-me-nots.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
Basketball players make good husbands. They never shoot their wives.
hat do you call it when a runner from Moscow starts a race at Red Square that ends in Finland?
Russian to the Finnish.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
Where do point guards take their dates to party after the game?
To a basket ball.
I like your tight end
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
What did the fishermen say to the fish that swam away? "You bass-tard!"
I hate when I have to stop scuba diving
If makes me deep-pressed
Where did the Flopper work in the offseason? At Dominik's Hat-Check.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
Golf balls are like eggs…
They’re white, they are sold by the dozen, and a week later you have to buy more.
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
In Quebec they used to practise throwing the puck in the zone, and then
sitting back to wait for a turnover. But eventually the players were
criticized for this dump-and-chaise tactic.
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Why did the basketball player sign up for a crafting class?
He wanted to learn how to make baskets.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
By the seat of one’s punt
What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?
COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
Deep sea diving is so dangerous.
I just can’t fathom it.
Why did the other volleyball team bow? Because they heard that the queens of the court were there.
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
What happens if you run in front of a car?
You get tired.
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
Which trophy has the most glitz? The Lady Bling.
How many volleyball referees do you need to screw in a light bulb? None because they are always in the dark.
What do volleyball players watch during their free time? They watch Spike TV.
Why did the ski instructor's love life always go downhill? The first thing the ladies noticed about him was his giant slalom.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot. Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
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