Which legend lived in a shack? Was it Eddy? No, Ma-hovel-ich!
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
My life-long rival just beat my record for deep-sea diving.
This is a new low.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
Why should you swim in an ool instead of a pool?
Because there’s no “p” in it!
I tried to start a soccer club so I put up some posters on a local bulletin board.
Just to get the ball rolling.
The dog didn’t want to play soccer because it was a boxer.
Why can't basketball players go on vacation?
They aren't allowed to travel.
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
Are you still wondering why the basketball player could listen to his music? Don’t you know he broke a record!
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
The reason why bowling alleys are so quiet is such that you can hear a pin drop.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
As a Brit, I can't get into American football
They rugby the wrong way.
What do you call a basketball team that cries after they lose the game?
A bawl club.
Golfer: I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddie: Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
What is a golfer’s favorite bird?
Any birdie will do.
Pardon me if I’m being pool-itically incorrect.
The target in soccer is to kick it where it counts.
What time should I book the court? Let’s shoot for around tennish.
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.
Why did the hotdogger quit skiing at MaryJane?
Because it was the wurst stunt skier at Winter Park Resort.
You cannot strike it, if you don’t try it.
Why did they arrest the volleyball player? They suspected foul play.
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
Which cool rapper recreates at Aspen Snomass?
Ice Ski.
What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall "Dam!"
Which local sportswriters are most effusive? Those who work in the praise
box!
The closer we came to the alley, the louder the bowling thunder.
What is the difference between a ball hog and time?
Time passes.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
You can forget about winning, princess. Because even Cinderella can’t get to this ball.
Why are volleyball players always so blameless? They always pass the blame and try to avoid faults.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
In the local snow bank.
What happened when an icicle landed on the skier's head?
It knocked him out cold!
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
Where can you find a golfer on a Saturday night?
Clubbing.
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
I tried to hit the picture cleanly over the fence, but it was framed.
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