Why did the horny duck circle the baseball field?
She hoped to catch some fowl balls.
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
What do a great hitter and a boxer have in common?
Both are serious sluggers.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
Why is Cinderella bad at soccer?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
What do you call a fish whith a car? A carfish!
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
What country do marathoners retire to?
Iran.
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
It is now a universal truth that actions speak louder than coaches.
Opposing coaches facing the Leafs in the 60s and 70s knew that Dave was the
one to Keon.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing? Just for the halibut!
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
The best place on earth to shop for soccer kits is New Jersey.
The Montreal baseball team relocated to Tampa after being purchased by the
Exposito bros.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
What do we call the basketball team that won the donuts championships? – dunkin donuts.
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
What did the player on the Bumblebee basketball team say after making a foul shot?
Hive Scored!
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
A guy walks into the bar.
It's hardly surprising he didn't make the steeplechase team, on reflection.
The last thing I can remember was the yellow ball speeding toward me. I swung the racquet, and then things got fuzzy.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
Which violation do ghosts get called for the most in basketball?
Ghoul tending.
I’m not a bad putter…
I just can’t catch a break.
Why are volleyball players always so blameless? They always pass the blame and try to avoid faults.
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch on?
Baseplates.
Why did the blonde volleyball player end up getting fired from her waitressing job? Someone said she needed to serve the food.
What do you call the basketball move where you drink too much alcohol and score?
SlamDrunk!
The coddled superstar sat in the seats with the fans instead of on the bench
with the team; for this, ironically enough, he was accused of grandstanding!
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
We’re trying to pool off the party of the summer.
Where is a basketball player's favorite place to eat?
Dunkin' Donuts
Which cool rapper recreates at Aspen Snomass?
Ice Ski.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
Golf is a lot like taxes:
You go for the green and wind up in the hole.
You can never get short balls over the net! Solution: Drop shot from arsenal.
The basic rule in the bowling game is to ensure you leave no pin standing.
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.
Go to BabaMail
