What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
Scuba diving is a good hobby... if you wanna hit rock bottom.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
How many Winter Park ski instructors does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to screw it in, and two to say, "Nice Turns, Nice Turns!"
Which hulking left-winger could body-slam The Giant? Dave Andre-chuck.
Why did the volleyball player cross the street? There was a team member bar tending who could serve spiked drinks.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
Longfellow is the known poet of basketball.
What do frogs do when they ski?
They rip it.
Why should you not play volleyball in court? Because you could get arrested.
Seven days without playing soccer can make one weak.
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
Guy: Have you ever been fishing before? Girl: Why? Boy: I think we should hook up!
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.
I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I go around this chairlift again?
We’ll have a splash-tastic time.
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
The refs kept calling interference, even though goalmouth incidents were in
de-crease.
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
Why did the blonde volleyball player end up getting fired from her waitressing job? Someone said she needed to serve the food.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
What did the skiier say when his standup act was going downhill fast?
There snow possible way these puns could be more painful.
Calm before the score
Did you hear the joke about the pop fly? Oh, nevermind. It was over your head...
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
Summer is just floating by.
It is not uncommon for elephants to start a stampede. Especially if they want to play for the Chargers.
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
Why did the football referee have trouble measuring the first down?
Someone was yanking his chain!
Why did the blonde skier cut a hole near the top of her boyfriend's ski parka?
She wanted to give him the cold shoulder.
The game of golf is 90-percent mental…
And 10-percent mental.
Why should somebody who's just out of rehab think twice before going on a skiing holiday?
Because it's a slippery slope.
How are a volleyball player and a carpenter similar? They both love to hammer spikes.
A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
What did the marathoner do after he won the race?
He decided to go into politics and run for office.
Did you hear the terrible rumor about the volleyball player? That’s what she set!
What do you get if you cross a baseball pitcher and a carpet?
A throw rug.
The best holiday for you to go bowling is thanksgiving because you will get turkeys.
How do crazy runners go through the forest?
They take the psychopath!
Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
Set or be set. This is certainly the right way to look at things.
When you go with an army general onto a bowling alley, he will start bowling even before you enter his name on the scoreboard.
Where did the Flopper work in the offseason? At Dominik's Hat-Check.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
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