The Montreal baseball team relocated to Tampa after being purchased by the
Exposito bros.
What country do marathoners retire to?
Iran.
Pick-up line: You might as well play be a tennis player, because I’m about to court you girl.
I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.
I made a huge splash.
The bowling solder decided to launch a pre-emptive strike.
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
What does a mom of a football fan hate the most?
A messi room.
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
Oh, I thought I was playing the first round, but I guess I got a free pass. Bye.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
What did the fisherman say to the card magician? Take a cod, any cod.
Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This is because it is a bum per lane.
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
We’ll have a ball.
What do you call a very slow skier?
A slope-poke.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I bet this chair lift weighs enough to break the ice.
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
What do you call a free treadmill?
The Great Outdoors.
Why should you you stand on the service line? So that you can order ice cream.
Cold Ski Pun of the Day: I'm tired of slalom skiing. Alpine over another telemark now.
Chairlift Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, is it really windy up here, or are you just blowing me away?
What sport does the Koolaid man play?
Baseball. He's a pitcher.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens. He was learning how to draw fowls.
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.
Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.
If you want a loyal marriage, get hitched to a basketball player. He will never pass you, rather he will keep you all to himself.
Basketball players manage to remain cool even during tough matches because they stay closer to the fans.
The bowling team of which I am captain is known lightning. This is because we get countless strikes.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
My moment in the sun.
Do you always play this badly at the net? Because I don’t like your approach.
What's the greatest problem facing Poland?
The four-ten split.
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
Why can't tomatoes ever beat lettuce in a race?
Because lettuce is always a head, and tomatoes have to ketchup!
What do volleyball players do when they go to church? Serve God.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
What do volleyball players watch during their free time? They watch Spike TV.
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
When your putt lips out, what disease do you have?
Liprocy.
The last time I wanted to go bowling, all the pins were on strike. So I just stayed at home and watched TV instead.
How are a volleyball player and a carpenter similar? They both love to hammer spikes.
There is a commonality between a thanksgiving and a bowler guest. They both love turkey.
Why is learning to ski in France so difficult?
'Cause sometimes they won't Alp you.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
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