What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
The best holiday for you to go bowling is thanksgiving because you will get turkeys.
Federer is such a legend that they named the Roger’s Cup, and Fed Cup after him.
Why did the other volleyball team bow? Because they heard that the queens of the court were there.
Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This is because it is a bum per lane.
Do you know the easiest way to stop squirrels from playing soccer in your garden is to hide the ball? Well, it drives them nuts.
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
The only difference between time and a ball hog is that the former passes.
Why did the volleyball players line up from shortest to tallest? The coach wanted the team to switch from a 5-1 line up to a 6-2.
Why do benched players always seem to look so wise? They don’t have to look like fools on the floor and entertain the crowds.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
How many golfers does it take to change a lightbulb?
FORE!
How are snow boards and vacuum cleaners alike?
Both have dirt bags on board.
Don’t get me wrong, I love our soccer team. However, in sharp contrast to the albatross, our team doesn’t have two decent wings.
How are a volleyball coach and a dentist similar? They both use drills.
Why don't quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage? Because they produce audible groans!
My moment in the sun.
Here’s more proof that I’ve gone off the deep end.
What did his wife give the guy when he came home all sweaty from his run?
The stink eye.
Why can you never use a serve receive pattern against a sniper? They’d all start running for cover.
How do ski instructors get to work?
By icicle.
The only way athletes can stay cool even in a charged game is by standing near the fans.
What do you call a married couple who compete in the marathon side-by-side?
Running mates.
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
The target in soccer is to kick it where it counts.
Why did the fish cross the road? Cause it was hooked!
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Which athlete wrote the book, Jumping for Exercize?
Lee Ping.
Why don't skeletons ski the black diamond runs at Copper Mountain?
They've got soul, but they just don't have the heart for it.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
A team may be talented, but there is no substitute to this, no train no gain!
What do you say when your dad wears a speedo to the pool?
Spee-don’t!
If Messier retires he's sure to be moosed.
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
Why did the ski instructor ask for a divorce?
He found out his wife is a real flake.
When the basketball realized all the checks were bouncing, he decided to visit the bank himself to find out.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
If volleyball were easy, they would call it football.
Why don't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is
What did the football player say to the flight attendant?
"Put me in coach."
Why did the blonde run backward?
She wanted to gain weight.
Which front-office type is the most promiscuous? The general ménageur.
Is the pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
I like my matches like my tennis balls: Pressureless.
What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?
Give me my quarter back.
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