No one could measure their height in medieval kingdoms.
Only the Ruler could.
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
What did the king say when he heard that the peasants were revolting? He said he agrees because they never bathe and always stink.
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
After which knight is a town in England named? Sir Rey!
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
There was this knight who would be always roasting whatever he would catch for food. Guess this is why he was known as the Bonfire Knight.
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
Which one of King Arthur's knights named the Round Table?
Sir Cumference
Did you know knights are known for wearing dishware?
Thats why they call it plate armor.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th!
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
Astonishingly, the first comic strip known to man was created by King John of England. It was called the 'Manga-Carta'!
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
What do you name a knight who has been able to persevere through all the barriers in his way? A Sir Vivor!
Why did the medieval Indian go to the doctor?
He was feeling a bit Sikh
In the medieval ages, chess was a very popular game among Kings and Queens. This was because they had castles in it!
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
Medieval castles would have been great hangout spots in modern times because they had a great knight life!
How do medieval cathedrals clean their mouths before bedtime?
They gargoyle
What do you call a knight who just wants to fight with an opponent on level grounds? He is called Sir Face!
It was quite dangerous for messengers back in the medieval era.
They often had to wear mail armor.
The castle and court of Camelot were famous for their knight-life.
Why were medieval people from Mexico such good engineers? This is because they learned in Aztech!
Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?
Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.
Have you heard of the knight whose enemies were always lurking near him and following him? That knight went by the name of Sir Rounded.
What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? Canned food.
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
What did Medieval postmen wear?
Chain mail.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
I like my pasta the way I like my medieval Italian literature.
All Dante.
Did you see that their is a Medieval play about menstruation?
It's a period piece
What do you call a knight that jousts all the time
Sir Lance-alot
What do you think is the name of the knight who unexpectedly turned up at the battle? His name is Sir Prize.
How did murderers hide the body in medieval times?
They start by dragon it.
What was that knight's name who would always go around and call other knights by their last names? Sir Name.
What do you call a stunt rider from the 1200's?
Medieval Knievel
Lance is an uncommon name nowadays but in medieval times...
people were called Lance a lot.
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
What is the name of the knight that spreads all the rumors and news of the court and the king amongst the people? Sir Culate.
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
The medieval queen was unhappy when she saw that it was pouring outside. She sighed to herself, "This could be another reigny day."
What did the borg say to the medieval peasant?
Resistance if feudal
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
A great knight became all discombobulated and lost his weapons...
He was all out of swords.
I think I met a medieval water snake
But I can't tell if it actually happened or if it was a dream.
It was totally Sir Eel.
In the medieval ages, many knights had to travel throughout day and night. In order to increase their visibility in darkness, they invented a device known as the knightvision goggles.
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
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