What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
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