Where do you imprison a naughty skeleton?
A rib cage.
"Lazy bones."
What did the skeleton bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
What did one skeleton wrestler say to the other?
You better watch out for my special move. It will verta-break your back!
Why couldn't the skeleton get a date to the dance?
He doesn't have the heart to ask anyone out.
What does a skeleton play in a band?
A Trom-Bone.
Why are bones so calm?
Nothing gets under their skin.
"Some people have no guts."
"Dying to have fun."
No body has ever won a skeleton race.
"You can't skele-run from my skele-puns."
Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To get to the body shop.
How do you know if a spine finds you funny?
It starts cracking up.
"Bone to be wild."
"Let's have some skele-fun."
What did the doctor tell the skeleton who wanted to donate his body to science?
Spine on the dotted line.
Why was the skeleton stupid?
He was a numskull.
"No body won the skeleton race."
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
What do you call a skeleton who lies?
A phoney-ba-boney.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
He had a bone to pick.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts.
What's a skeletons favorite activity?
Boning.
Where do skeletons go hang out at night?
Anywhere, as long as it's a hip joint.
Where do you learn about bones?
Osteoclasst.
How do a group of skeletons drive to work?
In the carpal lane.
How do you greet a skeleton in france?
"Bonejour."
What did the osteopathic medicine doctor bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
Why do skeletons never move?
Because they have too much Skelatonin.
My cranium is empty. I'm running bone-dry here.
"Laughing 'til I'm coffin."
Near the town of Hannah Montana people found a dinosaur skeleton.
Scientists identified it as a Mileysaurus.
Why do skeletons get sick on windy days?
It goes right through them.
What do you call it when a skeleton is having a great time?
An osteoblast.
Why couldn’t the skeleton get out of bed?
He was bone tired.
Why does a skeleton always tell the truth?
He wants tibia honest.
Why aren’t skeletons good at poker?
You can see right through them.
Why can’t a legless skeleton win an argument?
They don’t have a leg to stand on.
How do skeleton’s get their mail delivered?
By the bony express.
How do two skeletons have se*?
They bone each other.
Why are skeletons such bad liars?
Everyone can see right through them.
"Bugs and hisses."
What do you call a funny bone?
A humerus.
What do you say when you go to a dinner with a bunch of osteopathologists?
Bone appetit!
What’s a skeletons favorite wrestling event?
A rib cage match.
What is a 2000 pound skeleton called
A skeleTon.
What is a skeleton's favorite musical instrument?
The xylobone.
What do skeletons put in their photocopiers?
Skeletoner
Why didn’t one skeleton want to look at the other skeleton?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
Why can’t a group of skeletons ever get anything done?
It’s a skeleton crew.
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