Why did the uncouth spud not stop talking during the football game?
Because he was a common-tater.
Football is one habit I will never kick
We’ll have a ball.
How do you call football without shoes?
Socker.
Did you hear about the football team that drafted a vending machine?
They really needed a quarter back!
Case in punt
[Bundled Up Guy] This is what you call man coverage.
I feel tail great!
By the seat of one’s punt
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
The goal nine yards
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