Why are frogs great outfielders?
Because they never miss a fly.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
How do recreational league baseball players stay so cool?
They sit among their fans.
Which classical Greek may have actually invented baseball?
Homer.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
Why did the baseball player decide to shut down his website?
It just wasn't getting any hits.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why do the ladies love baseball?
Because diamonds are a girl's best friend.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
When is an MLB ballpark the hottest?
After all the fans have left.
Who wrote the fantasy novel How To Be A Better Baseball Player?
Ben Schwarmer.
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
And yes, gnomes are always trying to get to first base with the ladies.
What keeps the beat in a baseball song?
The bass line.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
What do baseball players eat at White Castle?
Sliders.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
What do you get if you cross a tree and a baseball player? Babe Root.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
What is the difference between a Yankees fan and a dentist?
One roots for the Yanks, and the other yanks for the roots. OUCH.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
What did the baseball glove say to the ball?
Catch ya later.
Why don't skeletons play baseball?
Because they don't have the heart for it.