Why do you never see owls being affectionate in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
RIP boiled water.
You will be mist.
I got lost in the mist today.
I didn’t have the foggiest idea where I was.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
Had a great weekend. Won the annual weather forecaster's championships!
I beat the raining champion.
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What always goes up whenever the rain comes down? An umbrella.
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
What do you call an English rock band playing in the mist? Foghat.
There's a basic difference between weather and climate: you can't weather a tree, but you can definitely climate.
What do you call a baby owl stuck in the rain?
A moist owlette.
What's the weather like in Mexico?
Chili today, hot tamale.
Many people think that when warm droplets of water in the air are rapidly cooled it forms fog.
But it’s actually a common mist-conception.
Due to bad weather, I won't be attending the Meteorology Convention.
I'm gonna take a rain-check.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
My wife asked me, “Did you fog up the bathroom mirror again?”
I said, “I don’t see myself doing that.”
I'm feeling exceptionally alone in this cold weather. It's probably because I'm completely ice-olated.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
Want to hear a joke about weather?
Actually, never mind. I'll just save it for a rainy day.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
The wind had such a great time. You could say it had a blast.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
I'm going to discuss global warming on Sunday at a debate. It's a very heated topic.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.
The winter is the worst time of year for a wedding. The grooms always seem to be getting cold feet.
I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
The only way bees can fly right through the rain is when they have their yellow jackets on.
What did one cloud of fog say to the other?
I don’t know. It’s a mistery.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.
His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”
He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Why did the cloud stay at home? It was feeling under the weather.
Q: What falls but never hits the ground?
A: The temperature
Q: Why does a hurricane wear a monocle?
A: It has only had one eye!
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
Q: What's a tornado's favorite game?
A: Twister
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
I over boiled some venison broth earlier.
It was deerly mist.
I tried to catch the fog.
But I mist.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
What does a tornado wear under his clothes? Thunderwear!
Local weather reports state there won't be any rain for 1 year, but I drought it.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Q: How does a butcher keep his tent up in a strong winds?
A: With steaks!
I'm trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
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