Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
How did Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
There's this video game about an FBI psychologist hunting a Viking Angel of Death....
I believe it's named Valkyrie's Profile.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn't a fjord a new one.
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla