Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
What types of stories do giant sequoias love to tell? Tall tales, of course.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
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