What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
What is a tree’s favorite geometry shape? The treeangle.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
Why was the sapling crying to her mom? She said the big trees wouldn’t leaf her alone.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
How do you get down from a tree? You can’t because down comes from ducks.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
What types of stories do giant sequoias love to tell? Tall tales, of course.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
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