What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
Why did the dad prefer driving in the rain?
Things ran more fluidly.
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
It just mist.
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
How could the skeleton tell that rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
A little boy asks his dad, “Why is it raining? Is the sky sad?”
The dad replies, “Yes, son, the sky is pretty blue.”
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
The only way bees can fly right through the rain is when they have their yellow jackets on.
It started raining coins outside today.
I guess it’s just climate change.
What did the evaporating raindrop say?
I’m going to pieces.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Why do you never see owls being affectionate in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
What do you call a bear that’s stuck out in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
What does a ghost wear when it’s raining outside?
Boooooooooooots.
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.
His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”
He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
Why is rain the best kind of music?
Because it has amazing drops.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
I don’t know if I got hit by freezing rain but it sure hurt like hail.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
What goes hiss, swish, hiss swish every time it rains? A windscreen viper.
What type of pants do rain clouds wear? Thunderwear.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?
Van Hailin’.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
A man went to the gym today and met up with his new personal rainer.
What did the baby cloud say to its mum when it rained? Sorry, mum, I couldn't hold it any longer.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.
That would dampen spirits.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.