Why did Frosty the snowman want a divorce?
Because he thought his wife was a flake.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
Why did the boy keep his trumpet in the freezer?
Because he liked cool music.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
Why wouldn’t the squirrel collect the oak’s acorns today? She called in sick and then went to the beech.
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A Puddle.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
An abdominal snowman.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
What did the snowman order at the fast food restaurant?
An ice burger extra cheese.
How do two flowers greet each other?
Hey bud, how’s it growing?
How does a penguin build a house?
Igloos it together.
How do Eskimos make their beds?
With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
Why are we only concerned about snowmen not snowwomen?
Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
What did the flower say after he told a joke?
I was just pollen your leg!
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
Today a large tree suddenly fell over right in front of me.
I was stumped.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
Mushroom puns are the best for any occasion. They are very portabella.
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
My wife wanted to plant flowers
Problem is she hasn’t botany.
Why are plants the best chefs?
They’re succulent.
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