What do Egyptian Pharaoh's and sandwich filling have in common?
They're both in bread.
Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?
Because he only dated mummies.
Q: What do you get when you cross a green mummy with a yellow mummy?
A: A golden moldy
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
Why did the pharaoh go to the dentist?
Egypt his tooth.
A lot of people don't like movies about mummies. I think they get a bad wrap.
Why do mummies never go on vacations? Because they're afraid to unwind.
Q: Why was the Pharaoh boastful?
A: Because he Sphinx he's the best.
Who does a dead pharaoh talk to?
His mummy.
How did the mummy defeat Superman? He had Cryptonite.
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
What would the Egyptian doctor tell to the wife of the Egyptian Pharaoh? He said that she was going to become a mummy.
What do you yell at two mummies making out in public?
Get a tomb!
What did they call mummy makers in ancient Egypt? Sarcophaguy.
Not a lot of people know this about me, but I'm from ancient Egypt...
Those that do know call me a mummies boy.
Q: What was Cleopatra's favorite type of flower?
A: Chrysantha-mummies.
Q: Why are ghosts scared of mummies?
A: They tear up the ghost's sheets
My son asked me if we were related to any Egyptian Pharaohs.
I told him, unfortunately son we do not even have so much as a toot in common.
Unlike fairy tales, the stories of Egyptian mummies always goes from riches to rags.
The mummy couldn't finish his Halloween candies. Because he was stuffed.
Mummies are very aware of investment security. Their favorite is Cryptocurrency.
Q: What do trains do at Egyptian train yard gates?
A: Toot-and-come-in.
What's a mummy's favorite song?
Walk Like An Egyptian.
Q: What do you say when a pharaoh doesn't pay you?
A: Egypted me! (He jipped me)
Q: What did Ramesses II say when he walked into the public restroom?
A: What sphinx in here?
Q: What was the most important holiday in ancient Egypt?
A: Mummy's Day.
What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date?
Any old girl he can dig up!
Did you hear about the mummy who goes to university? His favorite subject is Cryptography.
What did the mummy order to eat when he went to a restaurant? A wrap.
You should check out that Egyptian antiquities store.
They have a mummy-back guarantee!
Q: Why was the Pharaoh wet?
A: He was the reigning ruler.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
What did the Egyptian Pharaoh do when he got caught in traffic?
ANKH ANKH!!
What did one pyramid say to the other? Hey! Where's your mummy?
What did the thirsty mummy do?
They put on a thirst aid bandage.
What do you call Ryan Gosling in a mummy costume? Ryan Gauzeling.
Why do Egyptians shave their heads?
To make them more pharaoh-dynamic
What do you call a Pharaoh who plays the trumpet? Tootin'khamun.
What did ancient Egyptian pharaohs sleep on?...
...Temple-pedic mattresses...
Q: What game show did pharaohs like the most?
A: The $20,000 pyramid.
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