It's easier to prepare meals with this new cookware-wolf.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
Live to tell the tail.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
What you call the Ghost of a Chicken? Poultry-geist.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
What do witches put on their hair? Scare spray.
Which car is a Ghost’s favourite? It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.
What kind of werewolf can track down flowers ?
A bud hound
Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
Because demons are a ghoul's best friend.
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What did the zombie call the girl he was dating?
His ghoul-friend.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? No haunting license.
What job on a construction site is best suited to a skeleton?
Cranium operator.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
What do you call a little ghost with a torn sheet? A hole-y terror.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
Has the abominable snowman called?
Not Yeti.
Why did the troll go running?
To keep up with you!
What do you call an ogre in an accident?
A car Shrek.
Why did the skeleton have to testify in court?
Because he was a body of evidence.
What happens to witches who break the school rules?
They get ex-spelled.
What is a skeleton’s favorite mode of transport?
A scare-plane.
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
How do you stop an Internet troll?
Seize their memes of production.
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
All vampires seem to have the same thing for their last meal. A stake.
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite Beatles song?
The Ghoul on the Hill!
How can you tell that vampires love baseball?
They turn into bats every night.
What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
What kind of TV does a skeleton watch?
A skelevision.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
What kind of hotdogs do ghouls like best?
Halloweiners!
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
Titanic.
Why don’t vampires use the front door?
Because they use the bat flap instead.
Why did the skeleton have a broken heart?
His Boney lay over the ocean.
What kind of ghoul has the best hearing?
The eeriest!
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
My wife threatened to leave me if I didn't stop making monster puns.
So I guess our relationship might as well be ogre.
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