Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Who do vampires buy their cookies from? The Ghoul Scouts
Why did the troll kiss the witch?
To keep her busy in love!
What do zombie actors do before they perform?
They re-hearse.
What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?
A fibula.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
How do ghouls like their meals?
Runny!
What kind of ghoul has the best hearing?
The eeriest!
A vampire returned a mirror to my shop the other day. It wasn't faulty or anything, he just said he couldn't see himself using it.
Where do Yetis go to dance?
To a snow ball.
I knew a vampire who became a poet.
He went from bat to verse.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
What is a zombie’s favorite shampoo?
Head & Shoulders.
The vampire decided to eat a throat lozenge. It was the only thing he could think of to stop his coffin fit.
What do werewolf like for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
How does Bigfoot clear his sinuses?
With a yeti pot.
Why did the witch fall off her broom mid-flight?
She had a fainting spell!
The mom to the naughty vampire said to him, “Watch your battitude, that is not how you talk to your elders.”
A wise saying among werewolves: Chasing your tail will not make ends meet.
How does a vampire bat enter his house?
Through the bat flap.
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What's the slogan for the New York Demon Chomping Advocacy Group?
Gobble the ghoul.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
Dracula really doesn't have any other vampire friends. It's because he's a total pain in the neck.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? No haunting license.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
Why was the zombie afraid to cross the road?
He had lost his guts.
What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
What is the collective noun for Ghosts? Team spirit.
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What do Ghosts suffer from? Saturday fright fever.
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
What’s a Spanish vampire’s favorite dance?
The Fang-dango.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
What do ghouls say to each other before heading out for Halloween?
May the ghouls be with you!
The comedian ghost had everyone in stitches - he was dead funny.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
What do you call a dull ghost? Boo-ring!
What kind of TV does a skeleton watch?
A skelevision.
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