What do Ghosts say when they are impressed? - That was spectre-cular!
What did the zombie say when he failed the exam?
- I didn't have enough brains.
What do you call the last skeleton on earth?
The end-o skeleton.
How did the skeleton bring his groceries home from the market?
He used his Cart-ilage.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
You know why vampires can raise ghouls?
Because they are neck romancers!
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
What is the highest compliment a zombie can receive?
- Wow, you're in Grave condition!
Why do Ghosts avoid the rain? It dampens their spirits.
Who did the ghost take to prom? His ghoulfriend.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
How do you stop a werewolf attacking you?
Throw a stick and shout “Fetch.”
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
Buffet the Vampire Slayer!
What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
What's the difference between an internet troll and a video game character?
Video game characters have lives.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
What do you call it when a monster gets mad?
Ogre-reacting!
What color sheet did the ghost wear on the 4th of July? Red, white, and boo.
Why did the zombie lose his lawsuit?
He had no leg to stand on!
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
It's true what they say about scaring vampires with a torch.
You can see it in their fright of light response.
What's a werewolf healed from Lycanthropy?
Over the moon.
What did the minotaur say to the real estate agent?
- Amazing.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
Werewolves keep their spare things in a were-house.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
Vampires are too easy to play jokes on. Suckers.
What does a skeleton use to cut through objects?
A shoulder blade.
Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
To have his ghoul bladder removed.
Someone who does not become a witch until they're old is a late broomer.
What kind of pasta do skeletons enjoy eating the most?
Elbow macaroni.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
The zombie's had some bad news.
He's looking very grave.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
What did the zombie boss say to the zombie employee?
- Don’t miss the undeadline!
Why did the witch fall off her broom mid-flight?
She had a fainting spell!
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
What's a goblins favorite dinner?
Ghoulash.
What you call the Ghost of a Chicken? Poultry-geist.
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
Which car is a Ghost’s favourite? It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.
Where do Yetis go to dance?
To a snow ball.
Heard a rumor of a giant butterfly in London. Probably just an urban moth.
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