Two ghosts were at a disco. One was having a fa-boo-lous time and the other wanted to boo-gie all night long!
What did the witch do when her broomstick broke?
She witch-hiked.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
What’s a monster’s favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet.
I walked past Mozart's grave.
He was sitting up, shouting "Braaiinnss" and ripping up all his music.
I guess he's a decomposer now.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
Why did the zombie bite off the comedian's hands?
His jokes were too funny to handle.
What’s a skeleton’s second favorite instrument?
A sax-a-bone.
What do you call a one-inch zombie?
Tomb thumb!
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
Why did the ghost go to the big Labor Day sale? He’s a bargain haunter.
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
How do ghouls sign off a letter?
Best witches and worm regards.
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
Where does a zombie get a spare body part
Second hand.
What does goblin's blood consist of?
Hemogoblin.
- Hey, graduate student Minotaur, what are you up to today?
- Not much, just working on my Theseus.
What does Bigfoot say when he sees campers in sleeping bags?
- Yum, Hot Pockets!
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
What do you call a silly werewolf in Australia ?
A dingo-ling
If you see a ghost, you should always say, 'How do you boo?'
Yetis have declared their own independent state in the Himalayas.
It's an abomi-nation.
What is a werewolf’s favorite tree?
A lu-pine.
What type of art do skeletons like?
Skulltures!
An Indonesian Giant stubbed his foot on a volcano...
- Did he Krakatoa?
Why did the Ghost turn down the job? He could not see himself doing it.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
The mom to the naughty vampire said to him, “Watch your battitude, that is not how you talk to your elders.”
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
A man has been arrested in South Africa for shooting a giant chess set
What's wrong with those big game hunters?!
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
Come witch me to the party.
Why did the troll go running?
To keep up with you!
How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
How do ghouls like their meals?
Runny!
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Within the labyrinthine bureaucracy prowls the deadly Adminotaur.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
Why did the ghoul eat a light bulb?
Because it wanted a light snack!
Why do zombies speak Latin?
It’s a dead language.
Vampires can always Count on Dracula.
What kind of birds do skeletons like?
Sea skulls.
I wish medusa would stop objectifying people.
Which building do vampires always visit when in New York?
The Vampire State Building.
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