What does a werewolf say in church?
Howleluia!
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
What do you call a ghost of a man with a broken leg? A hobblin’ goblin.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock?
He got ticks.
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
Which soccer position does a Ghost play? Ghoulkeeper, of course.
What does the skeleton chef say when he serves you a meal?
- Bone Appetit!
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
What is a Ghost’s favourite toy to play with? Leg-oooooooooooooooo!
What happened when the monster's football game was all tied up?
They went into ogre time.
What’s a vampire bat’s favorite food?
I-scream!
What does a vampire need for making breakfast in the morning?
Pancake batter.
Why did the ghost go to the big Labor Day sale? He’s a bargain haunter.
How did the skeleton bring his groceries home from the market?
He used his Cart-ilage.
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
Why couldn't the little witch read her spellbook?
It was written in curse-ive.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A sour puss.
Why do Ghosts make such good company? They are full of spirit.
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-ritto.
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
When the ghost family got in their car, the dad ghost told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
Finding Bigfoot will be no small feat.
Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
To have his ghoul bladder removed.
What is a zombie's favorite kind of weather?
Brainstorms.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Why did the zombie bite off the comedian's hands?
His jokes were too funny to handle.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Have you heard about a man who became a werewolf?
He was distressed at first, but then he took a lycan to it.
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
What do you call a hairy beast that’s lost?
A where-wolf!
A Ghost walks into a bar. No ones notices.
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
They taste funny.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
Why did the skeleton start the fight?
He had a bone to pick.
What do you call a dad joke about skeletons?
A skele-pun!
What do you call a Minotaur in a playground?
A swing and a myth.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?
Ghoul-aid!!!
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
Skeleton 1: Why are graveyards so noisy?
Skeleton 2: I don't know. Why?
Skeleton 1: Because of all the coffin.
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