What do you call a medieval dentist?
A plaque doctor.
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
Although knights were considered protectors of the realm, they sometimes did get involved in the politics of their time. This was because the knights followed knight-wing politics.
How did explorers hide their treasures in the medieval ages? By dragon them to a safe location.
What do you call a knight that jousts all the time
Sir Lance-alot
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
My sister once took a knight as a dance partner to her high-school party because it was a prom knight.
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.
It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
What was written on a knight's headstone?
Rust in peace.
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
How did knights in the middle-ages get across a moat?
Moataboat
In the medieval ages, chess was a very popular game among Kings and Queens. This was because they had castles in it!
What do you call Sir Lancelot when he is dancing and singing to his heart's content at a party? We call him Sir Dancelot.
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
Sir Ohsis of the Liver
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
A great knight became all discombobulated and lost his weapons...
He was all out of swords.
Medieval cures...
Were leeches on society
What did the Medieval Gynecologist say to his patients?
At your cervix, m'lady
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
How can you tell a sword is a knights favorite weapon?
He doesn't use a lance a lot.
What do you ask a medieval crustacean when you want them to feel the music?
Art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?
When many knights were being killed by guns and bombs, the medieval scientist discovered a weapon that would destroy all their enemies. It was known as the knightrogen bomb!
Medieval castles would have been great hangout spots in modern times because they had a great knight life!
If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
What do you call someone who used to build airplanes in medieval times? Aerosmith!
The one time of the day when knights are willing to work is during the knightshift.
How do medieval cathedrals clean their mouths before bedtime?
They gargoyle
After which knight is a town in England named? Sir Rey!
For several days each month, some friends and I get together, play instruments and sing in a medieval style.
I guess you could call it my minstrel period.
Where does King Arthur throw his stupid knights?
In the Dumbgeon.
I killed all the knights in the Iron Keep, except one,
He was Allone
Why did Arthur have a round table?
So nobody could corner him!
Why are automatic doors like knights?
Because they're chivalrous!
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
What punishment do legs get in the medieval era?
decapita-shin
Digging trenches during the middle ages was seen as a great honor because it showed someone's shovelry!
Medieval Kings and Queens were afraid of the rain in the middle ages because the rain would storm the castle.
I read that in medieval times, if you lost your castle to invaders during a siege, it was incredibly unlikely that you'd get the well-fortified tower area back.
Guys back then were playing for keeps.
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
Why do medieval ghosts refuse to stop at McDonald's?
They prefer Wight Castle.
Did you know there were vegetarians in Medieval Europe?
More often than not, they were called "peasants"
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