What do you call a Roman with a wet mustache and a smile?
Gladiator.
What did the teacher do with her student's report on the history of cheese?
She grated it.
Which was the largest Gladiator of them all?
Gluteus Maximus
Have you heard of the knight whose enemies were always lurking near him and following him? That knight went by the name of Sir Rounded.
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and julius ceaser walk into a bar
He came, he saw, he conquered
What do you call a musician who just saw Medusa?
A rockstar!
What did the gangster say to Julius Cesar?
What's the most important day in Egypt?
Mummy's Day.
Did you know they didn't have smart phones in ancient Rome?
They had tablets.
Why were people in the Medieval times so self absorbed?
Because they thought that they were the center of the universe.
What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
What did the thirsty mummy do?
They put on a thirst aid bandage.
Nobody knows about Napoleon's brother because they were born-apart-e.
What's a snake's favorite subject to study in school? Hisssstory.
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
4 Norse gods, 1 roman God, and 2 astrological bodies walk into a bar
The bartender says: Oh, this is gonna be a week joke
The Romans must have thought the year three thousand was going to be tasty.
MMM
Julius Caesar
But Julius is too shy to talk to her
What's an Ancient Egyptian favorite restaurant?
Pizza Tut!
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
Why were medieval people from Mexico such good engineers? This is because they learned in Aztech!
I like my pasta the way I like my medieval Italian literature.
All Dante.
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
If Hamlet was alive now, he would have only worn t-shirts saying 2B or not 2B!
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
What do you call a Pharaoh who plays the trumpet? Tootin'khamun.
What's a mummy's favorite song?
Walk Like An Egyptian.
Why was the medieval knight polishing his dress before going for the Queens's dinner party? Because he wanted to have a night in shining armor!
The Romans used devastating wordplay against the Carthaginians, during the Punic Wars.
Which famous Roman suffered from hayfever?
Julius Sneezer.
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
My wife and I agreed for some Roman foreplay
I agreed to be Caesar and my wife was the beautiful Cleopatra
I got stabbed 23 times
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
What do you call a knight who wants to overthrow the King?
Sir Plant.
Why does a mummy enjoy celebrating Christmas? As it involves a lot of gifts and wrappings.
Medieval Kings and Queens were afraid of the rain in the middle ages because the rain would storm the castle.
What did the Egyptian boy say to the Egyptian girl?
Come behind the pyramid, I'll make you a mummy
The loveliest subject in schools History because it has so many dates.
What is the name of the knight that spreads all the rumors and news of the court and the king amongst the people? Sir Culate.
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
Vincent Van Gogh met a knight during the latter part of his life, who inspired him to draw one of his most famous paintings - The Starry Knight.
What do you call a stunt rider from the 1200's?
Medieval Knievel
History. History. Did I just rewrite history?
Pirate ship Captain: Listen up, I need some help in writing 2 in Roman numerals.
Crew: I I captain.
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
The comedian said a joke from the 17th century, the crowd went historical.
That boy narrated his-story really well.
What is the name of that knight who is very fond of the sea and spends most of his time at sea beaches? We call him Sir Fer.
Go to BabaMail
