Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
My football teammate asked me, “On a scale of 1-10, how do you rate our after-victory celebration?”
I gave him a high five.
Did I tell you about my new girlfriend who also plays football?
Yeah.. she‘s a keeper
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
I have a lot of respect for fans of football teams that consist of only ghosts
They have a lot of spirit.
We’ll have a ball.
Give me some pigskin
Why is Cinderella bad at football?
Because she’s always running away from the ball.
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
Having a ball
[Food Spread] This is the line of scrumptiousness.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
I’m establishing my punning game early today.
We’re calling your number.
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
The huddle is real
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
What do you do if a running back swallows the football?
You have to get him to cough it up!
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
I feel tail great!
Beauty is only pig skin deep
I like big punts and I cannot lie
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
[Chips] This is what I call a chip shot.
Which football playoff team are Star Trek fans rooting for ?
The Green Bay Picards.
Case in punt
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
The goal nine yards
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
o my friend Justin was late for the football game.
But that’s okay because he arrived Justin time for kickoff.
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
Why wasn’t the pig chosen in the football/soccer team?
It was a ball hogger.
Football is one habit I will never kick.
Jokes are a lot like American football.
If you haven't gotten anywhere with the first three tries, you'll need to rely on your punner.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.