What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
What do Walter Payton and Luke Skywalker have in common?
They both did great with a hand off!
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
I feel tail great!
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
Having a ball
Why is a Tornado the best type of football player?
Because it always gets touchdowns.
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
I made a snap decision to watch football today.
No intentional frowning is allowed here.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
Why did the football coach attempt to destroy the vending machine?
Cuz it wouldn't give him his quarterback.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
Why was the potato fired from his job at the football stadium?
He was a horrible commentater.
I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
What do you call a giant that's good at football?
Goaliath.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
What stat do the Miami Dolphins lead every single year?
All Porpoise Yardage!
The huddle is real
What does a mom of a football fan hate the most?
A messi room.
We’ll have a ball.
By the seat of one’s punt
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
If an Octopus were to play football, how many tackles per game would an Octopus have?
Tentacles
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
What did the football player say to his Chinese son
Go Long!
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
Football is one habit I will never kick.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
The calm before the score
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
You shouldn't wear glasses when playing football...
They say it's a contact sport.
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
I made a snap decision to watch football today
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
Go to BabaMail
