Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
I love you a tot!
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
What’s a potato’s least favorite dance? The Mash Potato.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
If you’re looking for potato puns, you can count on me to chip in.
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
I yam always very happy to eat sweet potatoes.
I like you a latke!
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
Everything in this world is either a potato or not a potato
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
Why didn’t the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a common-tater.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled.
Where does a potato go to college? DeFry
What do you call a spinning potato? A rotate-o.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
Boil ’em, mash ’em, stick ’em in a stew. Happy Birthday from me to you!
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
What do you call a potato at a football game? A spec-tater.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
Who is a potato’s favorite author? Edgar Allen Poe-tato.
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.