What kind of milk do people drink in Mexico? Soy milk.
Why don’t cows drink artificial milk? It’s too pow-dairy.
I tried finding the dairy factory last night, but I had no luck. I must have lost my whey.
Basketball players always drop cookies into their milk.
That way, it's a slam dunk.
I tried wild ox milk
Turns out I'm yak-tose intolerant
What would you call someone who cheats others while selling milk? A skim artist.
No one laughed at my milk jokes. They said they were too cheesy.
Where do cows write down their most intimate thoughts? Inside of their dairy.
What do you call yogurt that is terrified of other dairy products? A cow-ard!
Don't use raw milk to make butter
It's not worth the whisk
I sent my cows to bed at 8pm last night. I told them 'it's pasteur bedtime'.
Why does a cow hate artificial milk? Because the substance is pow-dairy.
I thought I'd have some evaporated milk on my pudding. But when I opened it, it was empty.
Did you know milk is the fastest liquid in existence? It’s pasteurized before you ever notice.
If there was a material made of milk which could store electricity...
...it would be called buttery.
Where do Russians get all of their milk from? Mos-cow!
Some people prefer milk after it has churned. I guess they find it butter that way.
My friend is always trying to make cows nervous. She's a fan of milkshakes.
Why did no one drink the youngest milk? Its parents spoiled it.
Where do astronauts buy their milk? From the milky way!!!
Milk aliens have landed. They said 'take me to your litre'.
Which religious figure does dairy products worship? Cheese-us!
So I asked Satan if he had any milk I could drink...
He told me "No whey in Hell!"
Which book will be preferred by a man who sells milk? Cream and Punishment.
What did the man say after his boss threw cheese, milk, and creamer in his face? How dairy!
What if soy milk is just regular milk that's trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
The spoiled milk always got what it wanted.
What does a cow say to milk? I am your mother.
Dad: Did you hear about the cow that was arrested?
Kids: No.
Dad: He was uddermining the authorities.
What do you call fraudulent milk? Cow-nterfeit.
What do you call a cow that only produces almond milk? One that went nuts.
What do you call a bee that makes a milk?
Boo-bee
My pet cow thinks she produces almond milk. She must be nuts.
You should never give milk to someone who is open minded and hasn't yet had breakfast. They're lack-toast and tolerant.
Why could I not imagine to have milk in the afternoon? Because it was beyond my wildest creams.
What do you get when you drink milk
A moostache
Have you heard about the movie that involved haunted dairy items? I believe it is called Paranormal Activia.
I tried out a lactose free diet. I stopped because I couldn’t figure out how to milk the almonds.
Did you hear what happened to the girl who twisted her ankle in the cow’s pen? She was milking her injury!
Dad: How does a farmer keep his cows in line?
Kids: How?
Dad: He keeps them a-cow-ntable!
I introduced chocolate to milk. They did a chocolate milk shake.
I'm worried that the milk I got this morning was from a cloned cow. It tasted exactly like the milk I had yesterday.
The thing about milk-inspired puns is you only reach 2% of their potential.
What did the cow say to his friend when they met twice in the same day? “What a cow-incidence!”
Why did the police arrest the milk after it was poured into a bowl of Fruit Loops? They witnessed him drown them. They knew he must be a cereal killer!
I went into the library and asked for pint of milk. The librarian said 'this is a library'. So i whispered 'I'd like a pint of milk please'.
What did the expired milk say after being picked up way past its due date? It was well beyond their wildest creams.
Why did the crazy man lose his job at the dairy factory? He was a danger to himself and udders.
What do dairy products say when they make a basketball shot? Colby!
I think I drank some expired milk. I just have a gut feeling.