What's a pickle's life philosophy?
Never a dill moment.
What do you call a pickle from the southern backwoods.
Where's a pickle's favorite place to go in London?
Why is the pickle container always open?
Because it's ajar.
What's a pickle's favorite book?
To Dill A Mockingbird.
What did the arrogant pickle say?
I'm kind of a big dill.
What's green and wears a cape?
Who's a pickle's favorite artist?
What do you call a pickle that got run over on the road?
What's the difference between a pickle and a psychiatrist?
If you don't know, you ought to stop talking to your pickle!
What's green and swims in the sea?
What do you do when a pickle wants to play cards?
What's green and pecks on trees?
Woody Wood Pickle.
If Santa made love to a pickle, what would they call their baby?
What did the pickle say when he was told he was going in to a salad?
I relish the thought.
Why do gherkins giggle when you touch them?
I've just got my hand stuck in a jar of gherkins and I can't get it out.
I'm in a right pickle!
What do you call a pickle doctor?
A dill pusher.
I've been feeling really down recently so I thought I'd cheer myself up by making a nice cheese and pickle sandwich.
But when I picked up the pickle jar, it said "reject if depressed", so now I'm off to take an overdose.
On what radio station would you hear Bob Dill-on?
What do you get when you cross a pickle with an alligator?
Why shouldn't you shoot pool using a pickle?
Because you'll find the cue cumbersome.
I recently got a new job as a golf caddy, but I was fired after less than an hour.
The guy asked me for a sand wedge. I don't think he likes pickle.
What do you call a pickle you got at a cheap price?
A sweet dill.
What's a baby gherkin's favorite TV channel?
Why are pickles in sandwiches always so polite?
What do you call a pickle lullaby?
A cucumber slumber number.
What's green and got two wheels?
When the giant cannibals started to soak me in vinegar, I'd had enough.
"Why don't you pickle someone your own size?" I shouted.
What's green and sour and swims in an aquarium?
A tro-pickle fish.