What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
I yam rooting for you my sweet potato and I won't mash your heart
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
Why did the potato wear socks?
To keep his pota-toes warm.
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
What do you call a potato wearing glasses? A spec-tater!
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
If we played hot potato I’d lose, because I’d never let you go.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
Have a s-mash-ing birthday!
Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
I love you a tot!
We’re a perfect mash.
I like you a latke!
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
What do you call a potato that has turned to the dark side? Vader tots!
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!