What kind of potatoes do zombies like?
Monster mash.
Did you hear about the zombie who was expelled from school?
He kept buttering up his teacher!
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
Why was the zombie so grumpy?
He woke up on the wrong side of the dead.
What do vegetarian zombies say?
Graaaiiinnss!
What kind of makeup do zombies wear?
Mas-scare-a.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
The zombie astrologer writes really scary predictions.
They're horror-scopes.
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
- Do old zombie actors ever die?
- Yes, they sometimes drop a part.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
"This graveyard's gotten way too popular," said the zombie to the vampire.
"People are dying to get in."
Where does a zombie get a spare body part
Second hand.
Did you hear how the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
He was dead lifting.
Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately.
What did the zombie carrot say to the lettuce?
- Give me your heads!!
Why did the zombie bite off the comedian's hands?
His jokes were too funny to handle.
Why did the zombie eat a light bulb?
Because he wanted a light snack.
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
Why did the zombie go to the doctor?
Because of his coffin.
Where do zombies go sailing?
Lake Eerie.
Why do zombies only date intelligent women?
They just love a woman with brains.
What does a heartbroken zombie say?
- I just want zombodie to love.
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
What cars do zombies drive?
Monster trucks.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
How do zombies introduce themselves?
- Pleased to eat you.
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
They taste funny.
What do zombies say before a fight?
- Do you want a piece of me?
Why do zombies speak Latin?
It’s a dead language.
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
What do zombies call a battle between classical music composers where one of them loses their mind?
A de-Bach-le.
Spent the whole day running around dressed as a zombie. I’m dead on my feet.
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What money do zombies use?
Crypt-o-currency.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
Where do zombie monkeys live?
In the brain forest.
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
Why do some zombies only eat the rich?
They are in the mood for something gore-met.
Why was the zombie afraid to cross the road?
He had lost his guts.
What advice would you hear from a zombie?
- Never put your eggs into one casket.
What do you call an undead bee?
A zom-bee.
Why did the zombie go crazy?
He had lost his mind.
Where's the safest place to be in the zombie apocalypse?
The living room.
What does it take to become a zombie?
Dead-ication.
What do you call a zombie driving a Ferrari?
A zoombie.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
Go to BabaMail
