What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What money do zombies use?
Crypt-o-currency.
What crosswords do zombies like?
Crypt-ic ones.
Why was the zombie so grumpy?
He woke up on the wrong side of the dead.
What do zombie actors do before they perform?
They re-hearse.
Where do zombies go sailing?
Lake Eerie.
Where do zombie monkeys live?
In the brain forest.
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
Why did the zombie take a sick day?
She had cold symp-tombs.
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
What kind of potatoes do zombies like?
Monster mash.
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
What kind of makeup do zombies wear?
Mas-scare-a.
Where's the safest place to be in the zombie apocalypse?
The living room.
What does it take to become a zombie?
Dead-ication.
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately.
What do you call a row of zombies?
A deadline.
What do you call a zombie door-to-door salesman?
A dead ringer!
What did the zombie call the girl he was dating?
His ghoul-friend.
What does a heartbroken zombie say?
- I just want zombodie to love.
What do you call a bunch of zombie chickens?
The Bu-gawking Dead
What is a zombie’s favorite shampoo?
Head & Shoulders.
Did you hear how the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
He was dead lifting.
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
What do you call a dog that comes back from the dead?
A zom-beagle.
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
What do you call a zombie driving a Ferrari?
A zoombie.
Why do comedians hate telling jokes at zombie night?
All they hear is groans.
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
What does the zombie say to her zombie crush?
- Are you going to kiss me or rot?
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.
Go to BabaMail
