How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn't a fjord a new one.
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
There's this video game about an FBI psychologist hunting a Viking Angel of Death....
I believe it's named Valkyrie's Profile.
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
How did Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
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