What is American football called in other countries?
30.48 cm ball.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Poor white splash.
We’ll have a ball.
Golfer: The doctor says I can’t play golf.
Caddie: Oh, he’s played with you, too, eh?
The target in soccer is to kick it where it counts.
I really hate these strings. I can feel it in my gut.
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Golf is a lot like taxes:
You go for the green and wind up in the hole.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
Who wrote the fantasy novel How To Be A Better Baseball Player?
Ben Schwarmer.
Why do volleyball players love to swim? They like diving in the deep and then floating in the shallow.
The Montreal baseball team relocated to Tampa after being purchased by the
Exposito bros.
The ref keeps shafting us the offsides; I think he's blue lyin'.
What do frogs do when they ski?
They rip it.
I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security
They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
Why was the Copper Mountain skier taken to the emergency room?
He hurt his ski bum.
How did the swim team manage to pay for new pool renovations?
They pool-ed their resources!
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
I like your tight end
What do volleyball players do when they go to church? Serve God.
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
Can linesmen enter the Hall of Fame? Yes, because they decide who's HOFside.
Why are fish so smart Because they swim in schools!
The football won’t be the only thing spiked at this party.
What type of stroke does a classical musician use when swimming?
The Bach stroke!
Everybody wants to light up a soccer stadium. However, this is only possible using a soccer match.
Why are spiders such great volleyball players? Because they have an amazing topspin.
Basketball players make good husbands. They never shoot their wives.
Skier in ER: Doc, I slipped on my way to the chairlift.
Doctor: Icy.
Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon!
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
There is one commonality between a magician and a soccer player. They both do hat tricks.
Which athlete wrote the book, Jumping for Exercize?
Lee Ping.
Skier: Doc, I think I'm addicted to skiing at Loveland Ski Are
Shrink: You may be going down a slippery slope. Do you feel a divide?
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
Why can't tomatoes ever beat lettuce in a race?
Because lettuce is always a head, and tomatoes have to ketchup!
Why did the vegetarian stop running cross country?
He did not like the meets.
What's the greatest problem facing Poland?
The four-ten split.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
The refs kept calling interference, even though goalmouth incidents were in
de-crease.
What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas?
COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
Which basketball team is the favorite at the North Pole?
The New York Old Saint Knicks.
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