How do werewolves stop a video?
They press the paws button.
Why was the zombie so grumpy?
He woke up on the wrong side of the dead.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
What did the zombie carrot say to the lettuce?
- Give me your heads!!
Witch you were here.
Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at the joke?
Because he didn’t have a funny bone.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What happens when a ghost gets lost in the fog? He is mist.
Bigfoot saw me today
I bet nobody believes him.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
Titanic.
What was the skeleton’s favorite Christmas candy?
Bone-bone.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
Did you hear about the zombie who was expelled from school?
He kept buttering up his teacher!
What does goblin's blood consist of?
Hemogoblin.
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
When the ghost family got in their car, the dad ghost told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
What did daddy ghoul say to his youngest son?
Stop ghouling around!
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
The zombie's had some bad news.
He's looking very grave.
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
What kind of werewolf can track down flowers ?
A bud hound
What did the zombie say when he failed the exam?
- I didn't have enough brains.
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
How should you greet a Ghost? - Long time, no see.
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
A Ghost walks into a bar. No ones notices.
What do you do with a green ghoul?
Wait until it ripens!
Why do some zombies only eat the rich?
They are in the mood for something gore-met.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
Because he had a bone to pick.
The zombie had had a really long day at work.
She was dead tired.
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
What did the zombie bank robber say to the cops?
- You'll never take me alive.
A man has been arrested in South Africa for shooting a giant chess set
What's wrong with those big game hunters?!
"That was a howling adventure!" said the werewolf to the zombie.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
I wish medusa would stop objectifying people.
You will never see a vampire betting on the horses. They can't handle the stakes.
What kind of fish do skeletons like to eat?
Carpals.
My wife threatened to leave me if I didn't stop making monster puns.
So I guess our relationship might as well be ogre.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
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