What is a skeleton’s favorite type of film to watch?
A spine-tingler.
What do you call a bodybuilder skeleton?
A musculoskeleton.
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
Why shouldn’t you grab a werewolf by its tail?
It might be the werewolf’s tail but it could be the end of you!
Why did the witch fall off her broom mid-flight?
She had a fainting spell!
What did the mummy say to the zombie?
- Stop ragging on me!
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
My wife and my friends are sick of my puns about The Abominable Snowman.
Yeti keep cracking them.
Which building do vampires always visit when in New York?
The Vampire State Building.
What do witches' cats like to have for breakfast?
Mice crispies.
Why was the werewolf arrested at the butchers shop?
He was caught chop lifting.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
A fur coat that fangs around your neck.
What's a zombie's least favorite quiz question?
A no-brainer.
How did the ghost get from New York to London? British Scare-ways.
What did the ghost who crashed the Halloween party say? - I’m here for the boos!
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
Hear about the race between the Yeti and the Sasquatch?
The Sasquatch won, by a big foot.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
What kind of potatoes do zombies like?
Monster mash.
What do you call a dad joke about skeletons?
A skele-pun!
Many people think that the Abominable Snowman doesn't exist...
Yeti does.
What kind of hotdogs do ghouls like best?
Halloweiners!
What kind of key does a ghost use to unlock his room? A spoo-key.
Why do Minotaurs make terrible detectives?
Because they hate to go on steak-outs!
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
What do ghouls drink?
Boos!
I know an old man who's a vampire. He's quite long in the tooth.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
Why didn’t the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn’t in it.
What kind of pasta do skeletons enjoy eating the most?
Elbow macaroni.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
Why don’t vampires use the front door?
Because they use the bat flap instead.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
How do ghouls like their meals?
Runny!
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?
High Moon!
Everyone loves my Halloween costume, but I still see room for improvement.
I guess I'm an ogre-achiever.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
What trees do ghouls like best?
Ceme-trees!
Dracula is vegan, he can't take any risks. One stake could kill him.
What do you call a werewolf with no legs?
Anything you like – he can’t chase you.
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