If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
Have you heard about the Italian Bigfoot?
The spag-yeti.
What does Bigfoot do to relax in his spare time?
He goes bird squatching!
The troll told his girlfriend that he was head ogre heels for her.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
Why don’t vampires use the front door?
Because they use the bat flap instead.
A boy ghost thought a girl ghost was cute so he asked if she would be his ghoul-friend.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A sour puss.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Which car is a Ghost’s favourite? It is between a Boogatti or a Rolls-Royce Phantom.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
Why didn’t the zombie stay in town?
There was a new head strong sherif in town!
What do you call a zombie driving a Ferrari?
A zoombie.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What kind of TV does a skeleton watch?
A skelevision.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
How do you make a werewolf stew?
Keep him waiting until the full moon!
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Why do zombies only date intelligent women?
They just love a woman with brains.
Werewolves love similes and metafurs.
If you encounter a sea monster, you better get Kraken!
Why do Ghosts make such good company? They are full of spirit.
Where do bad jokes about skeletons belong?
In the skelebin.
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
Why did people stop going to the ghoul hospital?
They kept coming out dead!
Hear about the race between the Yeti and the Sasquatch?
The Sasquatch won, by a big foot.
Which building do vampires always visit when in New York?
The Vampire State Building.
On reflection, vampires aren't actually that scary.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Why did no one want to sit near Shrek?
He had terrible body ogre.
What do you call a skeleton who goes out in the snow?
A numb-skull.
Are sasquatches superstitious?
Yes, they always knock on wood!
How can you tell that vampires love baseball?
They turn into bats every night.
When do zombies go to sleep?
When they are dead tired.
Where do vampires eat their lunch?
At the casketeria.
What's a ghost with a broken leg called? A hoblin goblin.
What do ghouls drink?
Boos!
How did the skeleton know the other skeleton was lying?
He could see right through him.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
Why shouldn’t you grab a werewolf by its tail?
It might be the werewolf’s tail but it could be the end of you!
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
What do vegetarian zombies say?
Graaaiiinnss!
What trees do ghouls like best?
Ceme-trees!
What is a ghost’s favorite carnival ride? The rollerghoster.
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