What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
Did you hear about the comedian who entertained at a werewolves’ party?
He had them howling all night.
What does Bigfoot do to relax in his spare time?
He goes bird squatching!
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?
A fibula.
What do zombie actors do before they perform?
They re-hearse.
Who is a Yeti's favorite Dracula actor?
Christobrr Lee.
Spent the whole day running around dressed as a zombie. I’m dead on my feet.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
All her food is potion-controlled.
What is a favorite game for ghouls?
Chase!
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
A pirate I know likes clothes made by an Italian fashion giant...
He dresses in Argh-mani suits.
What do you call someone who specializes in growing plants used in witches’ brews?
A hag-riculturist!
What do you call a skeleton who goes to school but doesn’t do any work?
Lazy bones.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
When the ghost family got in their car, the dad ghost told the kids to fasten their sheet-belts.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
What do you call a werewolf who cuts down trees?
A timber wolf.
Why do Minotaurs make terrible detectives?
Because they hate to go on steak-outs!
What do you call a hairy beast that no longer exists?
A were-wolf!
What did the minotaur say to the real estate agent?
- Amazing.
How do Yetis tell the time?
With a sasq-watch.
What part of the military do zombies serve in?
The marine corpse.
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do Krakens eat?
Fish and ships.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What happens to witches who break the school rules?
They get ex-spelled.
I have no idea how so many people didn’t make it out the labyrinth.
It only took me a minotaur two.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Which monster did the three bears catch sleeping?
Ghouldilocks!
What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A sour puss.
What do werewolf like for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday?
Fangs-giving.
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
Why did the zombie bite off the comedian's hands?
His jokes were too funny to handle.
Come witch me to the party.
Why didn’t the lady skeleton wear a bikini?
Because she was big boned.
Witch doctors write their prescriptions in curse-ive.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
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