How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
Who do vampires buy their cookies from? The Ghoul Scouts
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
Did you hear about the werewolf who got invited to the dance?
He really wanted to go, but the upcoming full moon was giving him paws.
What do you call a dull ghost? Boo-ring!
Why do girl ghosts go on diets? So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Did you hear about the witch who got plastic surgery?
She looked really good afterworts.
Why don’t werewolf make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
Witches always fly on broomsticks because they want to make a clean getaway.
What do bats say to vampires?
“You suck!”
What's the difference between an internet troll and a video game character?
Video game characters have lives.
What do you call a zombie door-to-door salesman?
A dead ringer!
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
I hear the Minotaur is really stubborn....
He's really bull-headed.
Who are the cousins of the werewolf?
What-wolf and When-wolf
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
How does a vampire bat enter his house?
Through the bat flap.
What does one vampire say to another before bed?
- I hope you have a fang-tastic day!
Did you hear that the list of famous vampires had a startling omission?
They forgot to Count Dracula!
I found out yesterday that the Mexican dish ghosts like the most is a boo-ritto.
What is Medusa’s favorite cheese?
Gorgonzola.
What is a skeleton’s favorite thing to do with their cell phone?
Take skelfies.
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
What do you call a skeleton who hangs out in coffee shops and listens to indie music?
A hip-ster.
What advice do ghosts give their children? Only spook when spoken to.
What sound do you hear when a Ghost explodes? kaBOOm!
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
What's the ghoul's favorite sauce?
Grave-y.
Did you hear about the giant who threw up?
It's all over town!
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Why do zombies only date intelligent women?
They just love a woman with brains.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul with an owl?
Something that scares people and doesn’t give a hoot!
What did the angry witch do after sitting on her broomstick?
She flew off the handle.
What do goblins and ghosts drink when they’re hot and thirsty on Halloween?
Ghoul-aid!!!
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite nighttime story?
A hairy tail!
Why do ghouls like ice cream?
Because it’s ghoulilicous!
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
What do vampires do when they are trying to fall asleep?
Count Draculas.
What do Ghosts suffer from? Saturday fright fever.
All vampires seem to have the same thing for their last meal. A stake.
Vampires love corny jokes and puns. I don't think they're funny, but it's probably to do with them being pun-dead.
Why did the zombie take a sick day?
She had cold symp-tombs.
Why was the book of incantations useless?
Because the author failed to do a spell-check.
Where do vampires eat their lunch?
At the casketeria.
What do you get if you cross a witch with a werewolf?
A mad dog that chases airplanes!
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