What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
Where do zombie monkeys live?
In the brain forest.
Where does a Portuguese skeleton live?
Lis-bone
What flavor of ice cream do vampires like best?
Vein-illa!
Why did the skeleton go to the dance?
To see the boogie man.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
The skeleton was scared of going skiing, he didn’t want to wrist it.
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
If I made werewolf puns, they would be howl-arious.
A green ogre came up to me and began saying how stressed he was/
I said, "You're a nervous Shrek."
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.
What do you call a skeleton who goes out in the snow?
A numb-skull.
How did the archeologists know the skeletons were real?
They were bone-afide.
What job did Dracula’s son have on his little league team?
Bat boy!
When ghosts visit the seaside, they always get an i-scream.
Why did the game warden arrest the ghost? No haunting license.
A vampire returned a mirror to my shop the other day. It wasn't faulty or anything, he just said he couldn't see himself using it.
Why did the zombie eat a light bulb?
Because he wanted a light snack.
Who put the Howl in Halloween?
Not ghouls just the people they ate!
What happens to witches who break the school rules?
They get ex-spelled.
Why do Ghosts make such good company? They are full of spirit.
What do witches in Australia ride?
Broomerangs.
What does a ghoul say when they wake up?
Gaaarrrh I love the smell of ghoul in the morning!
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What do Krakens eat?
Fish and ships.
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
What is a Ghost’s favourite toy to play with? Leg-oooooooooooooooo!
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
I knew a vampire who became a poet.
He went from bat to verse.
Where does Sasquatch store his stuff while he's out on a hike?
In a big footlocker.
What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
What do you call Bigfoot from Canada?
Sasquatch-ewan.
Why did the werewolf need to talk with the skeleton?
He had a bone to pick with him.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
What do witches put on their hair? Scare spray.
When the ghost watched a sad movie he started boo-hooing.
Witches get sore joints because they have broom-atism.
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
What would you call a singer who's really scared of medusa?
A rockstar.
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
What did the Japanese skeleton put in his sushi?
Bone-ito flakes.
Why did the skeletons stay out of the forest?
Because sticks and stones will break their bones.
What does goblin's blood consist of?
Hemogoblin.
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
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