What is the collective noun for Ghosts? Team spirit.
The local vampire society is constantly growing. They are always looking for new blood.
What do you call a fast broomstick?
A vroom-stick.
Did you hear that the list of famous vampires had a startling omission?
They forgot to Count Dracula!
What did the zombie say when she thought the werewolf was keeping secrets?
Spill the zombeans.
Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
Did you see that movie about King Kong, the giant ape?
The plot was pretty bananas.
What do you call a dull ghost? Boo-ring!
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
Panda ghosts love to eat bam-boo.
An idea is one of the worst killers of vampires. They don't see it coming, and then it dawns on them.
What do you call a small Minotaur?
A Minitaur.
There are two skeleton teachers at school. One is humerus, but the other is very sternum.
What happened when the werewolf swallowed a clock?
He got ticks.
Why shouldn’t you grab a werewolf by its tail?
It might be the werewolf’s tail but it could be the end of you!
A witch with chickenpox is called an itchy-witchy.
If you encounter a sea monster, you better get Kraken!
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a werewolf?
Terrier-fied!
What do you get when you cross a vampire bat and a computer?
Love at first byte.
Did you hear that the police arrested a pair of vampires?
They got them on two Counts of robbing a blood bank!
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
You have to hunt down a troll and kill it with a gun. After you find it, you accidently lose sight of it. In rage, you fire your gun. The bullets hit the troll and it dies.
What do you tell the person who sent you on the quest?
- I lost gun-trol.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
When a big giant eel takes your hand for a meal...
...that’s a moray.
How do ghosts find out their future? They read their horror-scopes.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
What do you call a yeti with a sixpack?
The abdominable snowman.
What did the zombie call the girl he was dating?
His ghoul-friend.
What did the mummy say to the zombie?
- Stop ragging on me!
You can't ever get the attention of a vampire on Halloween. They're way too busy looking for their necks victim.
Dracula is vegan, he can't take any risks. One stake could kill him.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
Who's a witch's favorite movie director?
Steven Spellberg.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What do you call a zombie in pajamas?
The sleepwalking dead.
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Why do witches not wear a regular hat?
Because there's no point in it.
I asked a vampire if I could borrow some money. He told me he needed to go to the blood bank.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
What do you call a werewolf that can’t decide what to wear?
A what-to-wear-wolf.
Who put the Howl in Halloween?
Not ghouls just the people they ate!
If I made werewolf puns, they would be howl-arious.
Why was Van Helsing so dedicated to killing Count Dracula?
Because he staked his whole reputation on it!
Can’t take my eyes off of her brewtiful face.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
Where's the safest place to be in the zombie apocalypse?
The living room.
What do you call a dad joke about skeletons?
A skele-pun!
It's true what they say about scaring vampires with a torch.
You can see it in their fright of light response.
Go to BabaMail
