What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
Where's the weak spot on a Scottish goalie? The fief hole.
Ed Belfour's new contract offer isn't high compared to other goal tenders.
Which Nordique great has recurring ligament problems? Peter Spaz-knee!
Can linesmen enter the Hall of Fame? Yes, because they decide who's HOFside.
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
I could go on and on about Salming but I don't want to Borje.
If Messier retires he's sure to be moosed.
Would Gretzky have changed his name in order to play in Mexico?
Yes, The Great Juan did what it takes.
Which LA King was the total package? Parcel Dionne.
But would they be stoned by the goalie?
No, they'd smoke it right between the pipes!
After the Moroccan scored a Hat-trick, the players gathered for the fez-off.
Where do players hide their marijuana?
Between the stash marks.
Which Habs great once worked as a janitor? Broom-Broom Geoffrion.
Why do referees always hurry to catch their next flight? Because it's "two
minutes 'fore boarding!"
Soviet goaltenders got their hair cut at Vladislav's Tress-shack.