How did brave Ancient Egyptians write?
With hero-glyphics.
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
Why do Egyptians shave their heads?
To make them more pharaoh-dynamic
Who used to run pen & paper RPGs in 1st century BC Rome?
The Carpe DM
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
When Julius Ceasar got defeated by Brutus in 'Battleship,' he said, "A2 Brute?"
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
Why was the roman soldier kicked out of the army? Because he was roamin around during war.
Q: When is a Pharaoh like a piece of wood?
A: When he's a ruler.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?
He wanted to Mark Antony.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
What was the favorite pass time of peasants from the medieval time period? They absolutely love to go serfing!
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
What explorer was the best at Hide and Seek?
Marco Polo.
What was Julius Caesar's answer when the flooring installer asked what he wanted to do with the old floor boards?
Carpet dem.
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do you call Sir Lancelot when he is dancing and singing to his heart's content at a party? We call him Sir Dancelot.
What happens to Egyptian girls who forget to take their pills?
They become mummies.
How did kids in Ancient Rome get their hair cut?
With little Caesar's.
In the old times, the medieval kings and queens would only visit the dentist just before their coronation. This is because they wanted their teeth crowned!
Franz Joseph constantly sour about everything because he was always Haydn.
What is Julius Caesar's favorite food?
Roman noodles
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
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