What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Why didn't the Romans have algebra?
Because X always equaled 10!
What did Sparticus do to the cannibal who ate his nagging wife?
Nothing, he's gladiator.
Where does a Knights templar keep his valuables?
A deus vult
My Gladiator DVD stopped working...
Talk about an *epic* fail.
When Napoleon is indecisive, he is torn-apart-e.
Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons?
He wanted to Mark Antony.
The only kind of Rock music that the Pilgrims were fond of was Plymouth Rock.
What do you call a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts? A Pharaoh Roche.
The ancient Egyptian people knew how to prepare delicious jams. It was only because of their skill of preserving things.
Why didn't the medieval farmers harvest flowers to make tea?
It would have been an exercise in feudal-lily-tea.
To get to the other tide.
My English teacher told us to write about the history of our life. However, I hate writing, so I used AI to write it for me.
I guess you can say it's an auto-biography.
In which battle did the soldiers form a queue outside a metal box?
The battle of Portaloo.
Have you heard of the knight whose enemies were always lurking near him and following him? That knight went by the name of Sir Rounded.
What do you call a gathering of Arthur's Knights?
A Sir conference
If someone else would have invented the airplane, it wouldn't have been Wright.
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
What do you call a musician who just saw Medusa?
A rockstar!
Caesar accused Brutus of cannibalism. "Ate dudes, Brutus?"
Q: What was Cleopatra's favorite type of flower?
A: Chrysantha-mummies.
Why do mummies never go on vacations? Because they're afraid to unwind.
What was Julius Caesar's answer when the flooring installer asked what he wanted to do with the old floor boards?
Carpet dem.
I think I met a medieval water snake
But I can't tell if it actually happened or if it was a dream.
It was totally Sir Eel.
What do you call a ruler of Egypt that hunts whales with a folding bed?
Futon Harpoon
Why was Julius Caesar the first dictator of Rome?
He was the only one with the Gaul to try it.
Q: What do you get when you cross an Egyptian pharaoh with a mechanic?
A: Toot and Car Man.
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