What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
What do you get if you cross a baseball pitcher and a carpet?
A throw rug.
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
Why don't baseball players join unions?
They don't like to be called out on strike.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
When the baseball team chose an owl masot, did they get a designated hooter?
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
Why did DPD rush to Coors Field?
They heard somebody stole third base.
Which baseball player makes the best pancakes?
The batter.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
Where can you find the biggest diamond in the world?
On a baseball field.
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
The winning home run didn't surprise the hitter. He did it all without batting an eye.The baseball player loved his treadmill and all the home runs.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
Why are frogs great outfielders?
Because they never miss a fly.
Where do baseball players wash up?
In the bat tub.
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?
Because the pitcher only threw scewballs.
And yes, gnomes are always trying to get to first base with the ladies.
Why don't matches play baseball?
Because one strike, and they're out.
Why was the nice guy such a lousy baseball player?
Because he never got to home base.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
What keeps the beat in a baseball song?
The bass line.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?