What is a terrorist's preferred kind of wine?
White Infidel.
"Be kind, re-wine."
Wine puns. They're always in pour taste.
Why do winos love cheap wine puns?
Because wine snobs hate them!
My doctor said I need to change my diet. He said I should eat more more caviar and drink more champagne. So, I said, "That's insane! What kind of a diet is that?" He replied, "It's called a High Fluten Diet."
How did the vineyard launch the new champagne making business?
They crashed a small boat into it.
What kind of wine is aged to purr-fection?
Mos-cat-o!
There’s a hair in my wine. The grapes must have been fur-mented.
"Sip happens."
Are there any funny red wine puns at BabaMail Jokes?
You bet Shiraz there are!
Where do connoisseurs lock up their best bottles?
In a wine cabernet.
"Another glass? Wine not?!"
"Cabernet. More like, caber-yay!"
Some people like beer goggles. I prefer wine glasses.
Fine Wine Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, what are you doing this fall? 'Cause I'd like to make you part of the season's harvest.
How can you tell a wine taster is a newbie?
By the blanc look on her face.
Where does wine catch up on all the vineyard dirt?
Through the grapevine.
I hear you like wine, too. Grape minds think alike.
Wine Lovers Rhyme: A friend of wine is a friend of mine!
"Alcohol you later."
Wine if you must. It’s not good to bottle up your emotions.
"I make pour decisions."
What do you call the guy who chooses a suitable fortified Spanish wine?
A Sherry Picker.
"I mead more wine."
What happened when a clumsy sommelier tried to decant a bottle of fine wine?
Things went pour-ably wrong.
What type of wine is notorious for making you drowsy?
Sauvign-yawn blanc!
Whenever I feel like wining, I remind myself to put a cork in it.
"Say you'll be wine."
"Chardonnay or should I go?"
Wino Woe: Forgive me, for I have zinned!
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
"It's wine o'clock."
"Time to wine down."
Wine Connoisser Point to Ponder: Did Marilyn drink Merlot?
Happy Hour is at wine o’ clock
"I'm not a wino. I'm a wineYES!"
Don’t ask me why I love wine. I have my rieslings.
My wife hates it when I mess with her red wine. I added fruit and orange juice, and now she sangria than ever!
This kind of wine does not go right through you. Trust me, you will pee no noir.
"Partners in wine."
"Rosé all day."