What is the reproductive area in South America? Spermatagonia.
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!”
What did the numerator say to the denominator when they broke up?
I'm so over you!
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
Why didn’t the Romans find algebra very challenging?
Because they always knew X was 10.
I passed my degree in sound engineering. I got 1-2-1-2!
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
I caught my friend harassing some electricity. I told him it was an abuse of power.”
Why shouldn’t you lend a geologist money?
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
Why was Romeo melancholic?
Because Juliette Cantaloupe.
Our landlord knocked on our door today and said that if we didn't pay rent, they'd turn off the heater tomorrow.
It was our last warming.
Why did the geologist go on a date to the quarry?
He wanted to be a little boulder.
My wife said she'll leave me if I don't stop the laundry punsץ
So from today I'm detergent to be better.
A knight asks a squire for the time
The squire says: it seems to be 3 pm
The knights shuts his visor and says: no, its knight time
Who brings colorful eggs to chemist's kids every spring?
The Ether Bunny.
I like jokes. But jokes about air conditioners?
I'm not a fan.
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
What do you call a sick Egyptian?
Sir Cough-a-gus
What element is derived from a Norse god? Thorium.
Wanna hear the mountain joke?
nah you won't get over it
Did you hear the one about the statistician.
Probably.
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th.
What is an energy provider’s favorite dance?
The electric slide.
What do the early European settlers in America have in common with ants?
They both lived in colonies!
What is a wise, old priest's favorite kitchen appliance?
The deep friar.
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
The repair man said he thought he'd fixed the propane stoves, but he couldn't be quite sure.
After all, it involved a lot of gaswork.
I keep scores of my favorite iceboxes.
They're my refrigeRATINGS.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
Where do mummies go for a swim? To the Dead Sea.
Some people think nuclear physics is interesting.
Well, in my opinion it's really Bohring.
Speed and Velocity are brothers.
Velocity has a family, is rich and teaches classes around the world.
Speed dropped out and still lives with his parents.
They think Speed lacks Direction.
What did Darth Vader tell the geologist?
May the quartz be with you!
Q: What did the Pharaoh do when he needed help moving his gold?
A: He hired-a-glyphics.
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases here."
Helium doesn't react.
I like to sleep with the bedside lamp on, even though my wife says it's weird.
I don't see how, I think it makes a great hat.
What do you call a glass robot that is good at physics?
A new-clear physicist.
Q: What game show did pharaohs like the most?
A: The $20,000 pyramid.
TV repair during lockdown has been pretty easy.
It’s mostly remote work.
My TV hates the outside world.
Whenever it faces outside it just glares.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
How good/bad was the Internet at the time of the Roman Emperors?
Let me put it that way: the lag was so bad it took Jesus three days just to respawn and he got disconnected soon afterwards.
What is better than a physics joke?
A meta physics joke.
What do you call a little monster's parents?
Mummy and Deady.
My dad used to crack jokes standing above our fireplace.
Now he's passed the mantle on to me.
What's a freezer's favorite time period?
The ice age!
Medieval Kings and Queens were carried by their soldiers and servants. I am not lying, they litter-ally carried that way!
What should be the name of the knight who the King has appointed to carry a census of the land? He goes by the name Sir Vey.
Why was the software engineer bankrupt? He’d used all his cache.
Go to BabaMail
