Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
A good friend of mine fell into a vaporiser and died.
She is sadly mist.
The evil King of Weatherland only had one favorite weather - hail, storm.
What do you say when the beach asks you to walk on it?
Shore
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
What did the flower say when he wanted a second chance?
I’ll grow on you.
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
What did Abel yell to his brother when he noticed a storm coming?
Hurry, Cain!!
Why is it impossible to have a balanced conversation with a female mushroom? - Because shiitake too much!
I have a good nature joke but after listening to it, everyone just leaves.
The shrubs were gearing up for a fight with the grass, but they never saw the blades come in.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
There is a higher chance of being struck by lightning than to be killed in a shark attack.
Shocking isn't it.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
They had us working like dogs at work after a storm
All I did was pick up sticks and bark.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A collie-flower!
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
I'd cut the grass but it's against the lawn.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
I stopped my phones to the cloud, and I kept getting mist calls.
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
Be careful out there during the snowstorm. It ain't snow joke.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
What is fire to a pyromaniac?
Just a warm-up.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
Where’s the best beach to buy sports gear at?
Jersey Shore.
I was struggling to find out how lightning works. And then it struck me.
Why did the chicken cross the river?
To get to the otter side
Want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I'll dig something up!
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
Why is rain the best kind of music?
Because it has amazing drops.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
My grandpa used to cut the grass before he died
but he has been lawn gone.
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
What clothes do rainbows wear? Thunderpants.
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
I would love climbing to the peak of Mount Everest, but I do not see the point.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
I invented beach footwear for people with one leg.
It was a flop.
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
What did the priest say at the flooding river?
God, dam it!
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