I had a rainbow for lunch. I'm trying to eat light.
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?
You wake up wet!
After all is red and done, all the colors in the rainbow are equally beautiful.
My grandpa used to cut the grass before he died
but he has been lawn gone.
What do you call an 'O' on fire?
Flamingo.
I thought I saw some fog yesterday.
But I guess my memory’s a little cloudy.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
The other day a tree asked for my help with kindling a grass route movement.
I said I wood because it's got a lot growing for it.
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
I was surprised when I saw a man get struck by lightning.
The man was shocked as well.
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
What did one cloud of fog say to the other?
I don’t know. It’s a mistery.
What do you call an English rock band playing in the mist? Foghat.
Feeling fintastic.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
What did they use to set off the amazon warehouse fire?
Amazon kindle.
Why did two fishes go to the riverbank? They wanted to withdraw their fins.
In what state is the Amazon River? It is in the liquid state.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
What do you call a waffle laying on a beach?
Sandy eggo.
What kind of fire moistens?
A humidifier.
What did the ground say to the earthquake? You crack me up!
I couldn't figure out why that ball in the sky kept getting bigger...
Then it hit me.
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
Poured beer over my garden before planting the lawn. I hoped the grass would come up half cut.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
Rock was magma before it was cool.
How do you wash clothes at the beach?
With Tide.
What did the water plant worker say when their facility flooded?
Dam.
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
What did the flower say to the flower next to him? Move over bud!
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
Q: Why did the cloud do drugs and join a gang?
A: Atmospheric pressure.
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
Did you hear about the cloud who became king? He rained for years.
I am still trying to launch beef and cream out of a mushroom cannon. It is not stroganoff.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
What did the little mountain say to the bigger mountain?
Hi, Cliff!
Q: Why couldn’t the boy keep his documents open when he left a window open in winter?
A: Because it was too Win+D
The ocean cut off all ties with the river, because the river turned out to be too shallow.
Tropic like it's hot.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
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