I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
What do you call a snowman in the summer?
A Puddle.
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
Q: What do you call a windmill swallowed up by a tornado?
A: A wind meal
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why did the man driving a train get struck by lightning?
He was a good conductor.
I heard there are some fires near Greece
We’re gonna need a lot of baking soda.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
What did the rainbow say to the other rainbow? Nothing, it was feeling blue.
How did the hipster drown?
He ice-skated before it was cool.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
I don’t know if I got hit by freezing rain but it sure hurt like hail.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
What did one hat say to the other on the hiking trip?
I'll wait here, you go on ahead.
Why does the ocean roar?
You would too if you had crabs on your bottom.
I don't like clouds. They're always throwing shade.
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
What did the teaching tree do when it went overseas? It took a leaf of absence!
There's a criminal who lives at the end of the rainbow, who likes to trick people. He is called the lepre-con artist.
Wind energy is so popular. It has a lot of fans.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? He had them stumped.
How do you learn more about spiders that live in the rainforest? Check out their web site!
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
Why didn't the mexican archer fire his bow?
Because he didn't habanero.
Lost at sea? I'm not shore.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
What do you call it when you plant a tree at each corner of a house?
A fourest.
How does the weather tie its shoes? Witha rainbow!
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waved.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
The feds were on a global hunt for a cow who was known to hide behind foliage. They finally located her in Moss-cow.
What is at the end of a rainbow?
The letter W.
Two rocks at the bottom of a mountain. First rock: Avalanche!
Second rock: Ha! I'm not gonna fall for that again!
Did you hear about the Spanish ocean?
Si.
When you get a rainbow after the rain at least you are moving in the bright direction.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
If you go to a beach and you can see through it, you could say the coast is clear.
I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
Go to BabaMail
