I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
You'd never get a rainbow in the red of night.
There was once a jolly happy mountain that offered fantastic advice to a grumpy hill. "Change your altitude", he said!
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
What kind of bean never grows in a garden? A jelly bean!
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
A disappointed Dad tells a knock-knock joke to his teenage son: "Knock knock." "Who's there?" "You're a mountain." "You're a mountain, who?" "You're a mountain to nothing, son!"
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
A storm blew away 25% of my roof last night....
..... oof !!
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
The man got shocked when he got down in the river because the river current was too strong.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
Why did the river refuse to join the sea? Because the sea was salty.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
One time, while visiting a river town, my brother was hungry and I fed him freshly made stream buns.
What does a door to door flower salesman do?
Petal his wares.
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
During the blizzard, the jalapeno said, I'm a little chilli.
When moving a piece of furniture at the weather station, you'll be needing four casters.
Why was there lightning and thunder in the lab?
The scientists were brainstorming.
Crabgrass in my lawn is always fighting to prevent good grass seed from rooting...
Guess you could say I'm caught in the middle of a turf war
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
Sea you at the beach.
The feds were on a global hunt for a cow who was known to hide behind foliage. They finally located her in Moss-cow.
Q: What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
A: You're shocking!
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out.
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
When you look at the sky and see the moon
You're looking at a subtle light
What do you get from sitting on the snow too long?
Polaroids!
What is the difference between a chemist and a geologist? While a geologist will drink anything fermented, a chemist just
drinks anything that is distilled.
If there was to be a beauty contest bringing together all the beautiful mushrooms on the face of the earth, the porta-bella mushroom would carry the day.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
Green seemed to disappear from the rainbow it came back in full force, olive and kicking.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
What do you say when you want a flower to drive faster?
Floret.
What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?
A mist conception.
Water you doing?
Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
I have an exciting new job as an explosives engineer blowing up mountains for tunnels and roads.
It's Groundbreaking work.
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