There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
What do you call an indoor plant?
An intro-vert
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
I told my mother moose were falling from the sky.
She said, "It's reindeer."
What’s every ice cream parlor owner’s side hustle?
Sundae school teacher.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
A mountain biker was chased by a Grizzly this morning. He bearly made it.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
Never forget how beautiful the mountains are. You don't want to take them for granite.
The Azteca Stadium in Mexico has been so neglectfully maintained that there are foot-long grasses on the pitch. Now we call it the Grass-teca Stadium.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind full of sand?
A: A rough draft
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
How do blondes define hydrophobic on their school tests? A fear of utility bills.
I'll open fire on anyone who says video games make children violent!
What did the flower say to the flower next to him? Move over bud!
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
What did the bride say to her new husband at their wedding? - I love you so mush-groom!
What’s the scariest plant?
BamBoo.
During the pandemic, all the children asked to draw pictures of the different types of grass. The children had to submit their grass-essments online.
"Someone's stolen the grass from my garden," said the man looking forlorn.
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
This rainbow is on its last legs, it's really hanging by a red.
What is known as the world's wettest animal? Rain-deer.
Have you heard about the banker who drowned in a river? It was a river of cash.
How do you learn more about spiders that live in the rainforest? Check out their web site!
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What did the little mountain say to the bigger mountain?
Hi, Cliff!
It was so hot that the bee's perm had become extremely unmanageable, so she turned into a frizzbee.
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.
Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
My parents always told me I can be anything I wanted, the sky's the limit
This made me sad because I wanted to be an astronaut.
Avoid pier pressure.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A collie-flower!
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
How did the fire ant feel after the rain storm flooded his home?
Very put out, indeed!
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft
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