What does the Ghost say when he sneezes? - Ach-ooooooooooooooooooooo!
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What did the ghoul say to the clown on Halloween?
Tag, you’re it!
What did the zombie pour on her dinner?
Grave-y.
A boy ghost thought a girl ghost was cute so he asked if she would be his ghoul-friend.
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
What's the similarity between a sailor and a thief?
Both have a phobia for sirens.
We've all heard about elf on a shelf, but have you ever heard of troll on a poll?
What do you call a yeti with a sixpack?
The abdominable snowman.
What is a ghost’s favorite carnival ride? The rollerghoster.
How do you stop an Internet troll?
Seize their memes of production.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
What kind of writer did the ghost hire to write his biography? A ghostwriter, duh.
What kind of hotdogs do ghouls like best?
Halloweiners!
What do you call a werewolf who cuts down trees?
A timber wolf.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
Vampires are not even real. Unless you Count Dracula.
What do you call a mythical being working in a smoothie store?
Mejuicea.
Ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them.
Why is the giant afraid of Jack?
Because Jack's beanstalking him.
I feel like Medusa was in some rocky relationships.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
Did you hear about the goblin that got his left arm and left leg cut off?
Well don't worry, he's all right now.
What do you get when you cross a ghoul and a vampire?
A hemogoblin.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
Vampires make awful businessmen. They just can't deal with the stakeholders.
I don’t care if all of the other giants see me as a big joke for filing a restraining order on a guy I’ve got 75 feet on.
Beanstalked is a serious matter.
What do you call a goblin with an injured leg?
A hobblin' goblin.
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
Why was Van Helsing so dedicated to killing Count Dracula?
Because he staked his whole reputation on it!
How did the skeleton baker make bread?
He Knee-d it.
In the night, a visitor came past my igloo. It was a yeti!
Not sure who left the other cooler, but thanks!
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
Where do werewolves hate shopping?
The flea market.
I used to fear giants.
Now I look up to them.
Did you hear about the werewolf who got invited to the dance?
He really wanted to go, but the upcoming full moon was giving him paws.
What did the zombie boss say to the zombie employee?
- Don’t miss the undeadline!
Take a vampire to a bar, and you don't need to ask what he wants to drink. He'll have a Bloodweiser.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
Why do ghosts and demons get along so well? Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
Why are Minotaurs always broke?
Because their loan sharks are always milking them dry!
Why did the werewolf laugh while chewing on the skeleton?
He got to the funny bone.
Why was the skeleton scared of the baby?
Because he was an ankle biter.
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