What do witches put on their hair? Scare spray.
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
You have to hunt down a troll and kill it with a gun. After you find it, you accidently lose sight of it. In rage, you fire your gun. The bullets hit the troll and it dies.
What do you tell the person who sent you on the quest?
- I lost gun-trol.
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
Why don’t werewolf make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
I just found out my Husband is a Ghost. I realised the moment he walked through the door.
Why are Ghosts so lonely? They have nobody to lean on.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
What did the giant say to Jack when he caught him sneaking around his castle?
"Have you bean stalking me?"
When ghosts visit the seaside, they always get an i-scream.
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
What do you get if you cross a werewolf and a pet dog?
A terrified postman.
Why didn’t the lady skeleton wear a bikini?
Because she was big boned.
What sound do you hear when a Ghost explodes? kaBOOm!
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
Why did the skeleton have a broken heart?
His Boney lay over the ocean.
Why are vampire families always so close knit?
Because blood is thicker than water.
A Ghost walks into a bar. No ones notices.
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
A vampire can't be a comedian. They just aren't funny, and worst of all they always know they suck.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
How do ghosts stay fit? By exorcising daily.
Why did the skeleton go to acting classes?
He wanted tibia star.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
The skeleton didn't mind that everyone called him a bonehead.
Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween?
The witches sweep the sky.
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
What do you call a hairy monster that lives by a dam?
A weir-wolf.
Did you hear about the goblin that got his left arm and left leg cut off?
Well don't worry, he's all right now.
How do you talk to giants?
Use big words!
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
The best place to search for information about witches is wicca-pedia.
Come witch me to the party.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
A vampire returned a mirror to my shop the other day. It wasn't faulty or anything, he just said he couldn't see himself using it.
A wise saying among werewolves: Chasing your tail will not make ends meet.
I feel like I have seen that ghost before...I must have deja boo.
What does the zombie say to her zombie crush?
- Are you going to kiss me or rot?
The zombie astrologer writes really scary predictions.
They're horror-scopes.
What is a witch's favorite ride at the fair?
A scary-go-round.
What do you call a goblin brigand?
A robgoblin.
A pirate I know likes clothes made by an Italian fashion giant...
He dresses in Argh-mani suits.
A vampire broke up with his girlfriend when she had a blood test. He told her she wasn't his type.
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