Tne thing you won't catch a vampire ordering in a restaurant is a stake sandwich.
What did the witch say to people who visited her house?
Come sit for a spell!
Vampires make awful businessmen. They just can't deal with the stakeholders.
If you think Earth has too few human-animal hybrids, then it behooves you to become a centaur.
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
If you encounter a sea monster, you better get Kraken!
What do you say when you see a stunned ghostbuster catch a ghoul?
He's a little confused but he's got the spirit.
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
What is the collective noun for Ghosts? Team spirit.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
Why do Bigfoots like to tell jokes?
Because they're killer comedians.
Why did the troll fall back with his army?
He didn't want to be ogre-run by the enemy.
Please stop making jokes about little people
How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
What’s a ghoul’s favorite love story?
Romeo and Ghouliet!
What did the doctor say to the skeleton who had a temperature of 103 degrees?
- Looks like you are running a femur.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Why did the troll kiss the witch?
To keep her busy in love!
If I made werewolf puns, they would be howl-arious.
How can you tell that vampires love baseball?
They turn into bats every night.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
I’ve found that dressing up like this has truly been an en-witching experience.
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday? South Aarghfricaargh.
Who is Medusa’s cheesy cousin?
Gorgon Zola
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
What did mother werewolf say to the naughty boy werewolf?
- We're werewolves, not swear-wolves.
I used to be a werewolf but I’m ok noooooooooooow!!
Why wouldn’t the ghost eat liver? He didn’t have the stomach for it.
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What do ghouls eat for supper? Spooketi
Did you hear about the skeleton who dropped out of medical school?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
Shrek isn't bad, but he's not that great either. I guess you could say he's medi-ogre.
Why do witches only ride their broomsticks at night?
That's the time to sweep.
Why do comedians hate telling jokes at zombie night?
All they hear is groans.
When a Minotaur considers himself an optimist is it that he sees his glass as half-bull?
Did you hear about the comedian who entertained at a werewolves’ party?
He had them howling all night.
How should you greet a Ghost? - Long time, no see.
Where did the ghost go on holiday? The Boohamas.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
What kind of fish do skeletons like to eat?
Carpals.
How do ghosts wash their hair? Sham-boo.
Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal-sized clippers?
Shear size.
What does Bigfoot do to relax in his spare time?
He goes bird squatching!
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